Hello my dears! My name is Johanna, and I welcome you to the Johanna Draconis - The Deconstruction Of C-PTSD podcast.
In this episode we will talk about everything just being too much - as in being overwhelmed. This includes really everything. Thousand things pulling on you.
It is one of the symptoms - especially when we are in our healing waves worse phase. So let us talk about it.
Since I am an autist I am also dealing with this on a separate level, so apologizes if things spill a bit over. Though in my experience those are two different version of being overwhelmed.
One is more psychological, while the other is more in the brain and nerves - if that makes any sense. Either way, I am all too familiar with everything being too much and feeling overwhelmed.
It is a feeling like being in a current, unable to really move or do anything, but unlike a current you can’t even explain what is going on. Just that everything is kind of too much. Like a whole ocean dropping on top of you.
Just pressing you down and you have trouble just standing. Everything is too much and even sort of painful. It is hard to think or speak… or explain what is going on. You just want to be left alone.
Why does it happen?
Like mentioned earlier this usually happens if we are going downhill as part of the cycle or wave whatever you want to call it. It can be used as a way to measure where you are in the healing cycle.
It means your brain is stressed out to its limit with an issue and tries to tackle it. In the best case it is able to remove the issue from the list. This depends on the tools the brain is able to use and the issue - naturally.
Because the brain is so occupied with fighting the issue, it uses all the energy it has on it. Leaving no resources left to filter anything or deal with new input - at least in the worst version of this.
Which makes anything coming in painful and causing stress. This doesn’t mean you are now back at square one, but just that you are taking a hit and need to step carefully and defend yourself.
What can we do?
How we defend ourselves depends strongly on the severity of the situation. If literally everything is too much, then there is little else we can do, besides all the relaxation techniques, mantras and the like.
Anything that helps to calm ourselves and let this storm go right over us. We need to be as calm as possible so the brain can work in peace. Sadly anything else would just overwhelm us again.
If it is less severe, then music can be EXTREMELY helpful, it can almost sometimes blast the storm away. Drawing, working out, fishing, any hobby or activity that helps you, but that doesn’t require much think work.
Music can also help the brain fight the issue - if you select the right song, it might help the brain figure out what the issue exactly is and how to tackle it. Sadly that is an skill by itself and goes beyond this episode.
The most important thing is that you take very good care of yourself, as much as you can. I know how hard it can be in this state to do anything really, but you really have to tread carefully.
Take a step back
Sadly this often means we have also take a step back progress wise. As we are not able to do what we could do a few days before. I know it is hard to give this bastard of an illness even an inch.
You don’t want to give up what you just fought so hard to regain. But that is one of those cases where you have to weigh in, if it is worth using all your energy fighting it and risking your state worsening even more.
Not that I am a lot different, I am also rather stubborn in that regard. But it has shown again and again, that if you don’t fight this storm, but rather sit it out and move afterwards - that you move faster on the long run.
This feeling of overwhelming usually occurs when we are at our limit. It is a sign we went a bit too fast or were confronted with too much or the like. We can’t sadly move as fast as want on our healing path.
Small steady steps lead to the goal. Even though it is the hardest thing to be patient enough to do just that.
That was it for todays episode, I hope you liked it. If you have any questions or feedback and the like, please let me know at firstname.lastname@example.org.
More information and transcript you can find as usually under johannadraconis.com/Podcast, information regarding therapy you can find under johannadraconis.com/Therapy and links are in the description.
I hope to see you next time. Watch yourselves and have a wonderful time!