Episode 99 - Dealing with bad days

Intro
Hello my dears! My name is Johanna, and I welcome you to the Johanna Draconis - The Deconstruction Of C-PTSD podcast.
In this episode we will talk about something we touched upon several times in this podcast - bad days. A rather uncomfortable topic and something everyone of us would rather avoid, but sadly is a significant part in your healing journey.
It is something we need to be open and honest about, especially with ourselves. So let us talk about it.

Prelude
There are just these days when you wake up and you know… today no big strikes will be done. Sometimes even making it to the evening can be an achievement to be proud about. Not that it will feel like it, but it is.
There are of course also the bad phases or worst days, where you are at your lowest. The bad days are worse in some regard, because everything is going well and then the bad day apparently comes out of nowhere.
It is like the ground under your feet is suddenly gone and you just fall. And you are also left to wonder if it is just a bad day or the start of a bad episode.
It is frightening, unsettling and demotivating, which is why we talk today about 5 points to help you hopefully to better deal with bad days.

1. Don’t fight the bad day
First, don’t fight the bad day. As much and as tempting it is to try to turn this day into a positive and not into a complete failure - it is sadly wasted energy - like swimming against the stream. And you NEED that energy.
When you have limited energy, like when you are recovering or on your healing journey, it is crucial to have good energy management. That means knowing when to sit it out and when to push. When to use defense and when to use offense.
And bad days mean is is high time to dig in deep and try to minimize the damage as much as possible. It sucks, but sometimes there is no choice.

2. Don’t try to catch up
Second, don’t try to catch up. This usually applies to the next day, but also sometimes for the time after. Once again it is tempting to try to catch up the lost time and all the work that was piling up, but doing so will just exhaust you and likely make you crash.
I went through that several times myself. It is not worth it, as much as it pains you to see the piles just getting bigger and bigger. But sadly it isn’t like just because you feel better again that you have loads of energy reserves suddenly appear out of nowhere.
If you can - add a bit to your daily stuff, but be very careful as pacing is really important.

3. Going good isn’t the norm
Third, going good isn’t the norm. This is something we like to assume, that the good times are the standard and the rest are the off times. That makes it so hard to spot the good times while you are in them - you expect them to keep going.
But things going good isn’t the norm. They are the unusual exception. Neither is everything going wrong. Normal is - as usually - a mix of good and bad and the mix varies daily. Though I would like to argue that the good things usually are more.
We just sadly have the tendency to focus on the bad things… and rarely do the good things overshadow everything.

4. Nothing you can do about them
Fourth, there is nothing you can do about them. Which makes them so horrible. There is a good reason why being surrendered to fate causes depression or at least a depressive mood. Which is not what I am meaning or suggesting - luckily.
But that you have to sit them out. Like a rainy day. Just more frustrating. The best, in my experience, is just to let go and call it a dead day, where nothing happens. And try to get as much positive energy as you can.
Or at least minimize the negative effects. Min maxing is needed. Minimal effort, maximal results. Routine and experience helps as usual. I always recommend to try around and see what works for you best. Everyone is different.

5. It will pass
And last, but most definitely not least: It will pass. That is not the most comforting thought but it helped me through my PTSD journeys. Everything passes. The good and the bad. It is a law of nature. Everything passes - nothing remains the same.
And while that doesn’t make your heart full of hope - it is a good lifeline. I also think it is important to remember that you are getting there - how fast is not really important. Only getting there. As much as we prefer the faster the better.
On the other hand - we never reach our goal as fast as we want. We are usually kind of impatient… so I recommend pacing yourself and trying to make most of the trip. No matter how bad the trip is - it can still be made better.
Not necessarily good, but better.

Outro
That was it for todays episode, I hope you found it helpful. Hope you are safe and well. And as always, if you have any questions or feedback and the like, please let me know at contactme@johannadraconis.com.
More information and transcript you can find as usually under johannadraconis.com/Podcast, information regarding therapy you can find under johannadraconis.com/Therapy and links are in the description.
I hope to see you next time. Watch yourselves and have a wonderful time.

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